Tuesday, June 1, 2010
I can do this...
Painting entitled Isle of Hope by Brian Jekel
I can do this. I can do this. I can do this. Can I do this? Yes, I can do this but only because He goes with me.
The opportunity came last week. A phone call from a friend in my Beth Moore Esther Bible Study came unexpectedly one morning. She fed me some intriguing information about a need at a bank for someone like me, with my past working experience and my current situation: an unemployed spouse, children out of school for the summer. The prospect is this: two weeks full time doing something I enjoy, then part time for a few weeks TEMPORARILY and then the job is over, poof. "What do you think? Can you do this?", my friend asked.
I talked it over with Rod. (Okay, I begged him..."Please, please, please let me do this. I REALLY want to! It's ONLY for two weeks and then a few weeks. You can handle the homefront for that tiny space of time, right?") He agreed, smiling at my what? Enthusiasm? I don't know. He just said yes and I called my friend back like a giddy school girl. She told me what to do next. The ball began rolling. I finally realized I needed to pray. Sometimes you see the brass ring and just reach up your hand to grab it.
I prayed. Then a million butterflies multiplied in my stomach and they began dancing. "Rod, is this the right thing? Is this from God?" He began laughing that laugh that I love to hear. He giggled at me and his face contorted in such a nice way that I got to see those hidden dimples of his (orange slices set on end). "Of course, this is God, Jenn. How can you not see that? You emailed your resume to this bank two weeks ago and prayed after you sent it that if it was God's will, He would give you a job there. Now, He didn't give you the job you were interested in, but He gave you something else. Something to get your feet wet. How can you not see that this has the LORD written all over it? Come on!"
Okay. It's true. Out of the blue my friend from Bible study (who does work at a bank, but not this particular bank) knows someone who's husband is pretty high up in this bank that I want to work at. That lady also goes to our Bible study, but I never knew her husband worked at this bank. It's crazy. And when an opportunity comes to you that's "crazy" like this is, it's Him. It's got to be.
After a few days of jumping through the necessary hoops to land a job these days (wow, are there a lot of hoops...not like it used to be when you took the Help Wanted sign out of the window and brought it inside and said, "Do you still need help?") I had my interview this morning with the HR representative. I was imbibed with the Holy Spirit. Do you know what "imbibed" means? It means to soak or saturate. (When I make the White House Christmas Cherry Trifle I "imbibe" the yellow cake with port wine...that is, when I used to make it with the preferred alcoholic ingredient, now a days I just save the Bing cherry juice from the can and add vanilla extract...it might be even better tasting). I'm telling you, in spite of the fact that I have not worked full time in over seven years, this interview went very well.
I'm at the tail end of the Esther Bible study. Have I sung its praises yet? It's THE BEST Beth Moore Bible study I've done yet, and I'm not alone. Many of my fellow female studiers agree. It's utterly amazing. She roots out these hidden truths that are sparkling diamonds from black chunks of coal. My mindframe has been wrapped in the discovery of these new truths. God prepared me for this opportunity to serve Him "at such a time as this". My enemy may mean my current trials for evil, to rob me of my security and try to feign a sense of betrayal and abandonment (because Rod has been unable to secure a job). But, what my enemy means for evil, God means for good. In the words of Beth Moore, "God's trying to make warriors out of us."
The scripture says, "If you fully obey the LORD your God...the LORD will grant that the enemies who rise up against you will be defeated before you. They will come at you from one direction but flee from you in seven." Deuteronomy 28:1a,7 Woo-Hoo! Just picture that!
Moore continues, "If we could only see what is happening around us in the unseen realm, our eyes would nearly pop out of the socket....So much that would thrill us lies beyond our sight. Covenant children of God are marked--even dressed--in ways obvious to both heaven and hell but invisible to man. I'm not at all sure we don't bear an inscription on our foreheads somewhat like the one prescribed by God for the plate of the priest's turban. The engraving "Holy to the Lord" was the first thing people saw when they looked in the face of a priest....A Christian may fret at times over lack of certainty concerning her salvation, but I don't believe the Evil One ever wonders who belongs to God and who does not. We are blatantly identifiable in robes of righteousness and garments of salvation." From Beth Moore's Esther, It's Tough Being a Woman workbook pg 189.
This is the mindset I am operating from: God has clothed me with eternal garments of salvation. I may not be able to see them, but they are there nevertheless. He gave favor to Esther and He has given it to me. I feel it and I am empowered with this new information regarding my invisible uniform of heavenly authority as a sovereign daughter of the King. Hey, are you wearing this royal robe, too? Straighten up that spine, pull those shoulders back; this is no time for slouching and slumping. You are His Royal Child!
Now do this fabulous and very simple thing. Draw a triangle on a piece of paper. Put GOD in the middle of the triangle. Write "works out everything, Eph 1:11" across the bottom. Write "works in you according to His good purpose, Phil 2:13" up one side. Write "Works all things for our good, Rom 8:28" up the last side. Read it and believe it. Stand on those scriptures with me. God works out everything and He works in you according to His good purpose and He works all things for our good. It's a promise. He's working on you, in you, through you (and me too, he he he)! This project came from Beth Moore, too. Here's what she asks about this triangle and the accompanying scriptures, "...What has this truth come to mean to you?" Here is what it means to me:
Anxiety does not belong in my heart.
God is supremely in control (insomnia and all...read Esther)
What Satan means for evil
God means it for our good.
So, like my sister, Esther, God has called me forth for what seems like a wonderful adventure. One last hurdle to cross...waiting for the HR personnel from my past employers to make their reports. And then, the fun begins. I can do this. I can do this. I can do this. So can Rod. So can Rod. So can Rod. Pray for us, I know you are. Thank you!